Been watching a lot of movies. Have a lot of thoughts. Saving them for proper posts. Hot take for the moment tho is that the Burton-era Batmans are the best Batmans and Keaton's Batman is the best Batman.
I never want to go back to work. I hate working. I hate it so much. Working is such horseshit.
Still working on the EP. It's almost finished. I'm loving the way it is coming out. 💗
I was gonna say more but I'm distracted. I think I'm gonna try some of that pomodori or whatever timer thing. Get my brain sorted out.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
There are so many great things about living in an apartment. Like, trash day is EVERY DAY. I don't have to mow/shovel. If something breaks someone comes and fixes it.
Now I'm aware that we live in a bougie apartment and ymmv. But like, I am never living in a house ever again.
We got a subscription to the Criterion Channel and it is such a delight to watch old movies that aren't whatever the fuck is coming out right now.
I actually have a couple of films I'm excited to write about. But later.
We're going to be putting out an instrumental EP this week and an album on Jan 1. I'm excited. Plus, exterminating the backlog feels good. I'm mastering the EP right now. The album is actually already done, but we want to drop the EP first.
I think this afternoon I'm going to read a book. I have been itching to get back on social media and that's just such a bad idea. Or maybe I'll queue up Criterion and watch a movie while working on this blanket I started crocheting.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
I am taking a fast from social media. "But you don't have any social media?" Right. But I lurk it. A lot.
American politics are so bad. All the news is bad. We have a party in power who refuses to govern in the face of a minority party that is doing a coup in real time and they don't care and nothing matters.
Our 2.5 year plan is to get the fuck out of here, but I feel like it needs to be sooner. We need to be out of here before the 2024 elections for sure, but I'd extra like to be out of here before the 2022 "midterm" ones. Because it's going to be the real end at that point.
I suppose in the end it doesn't matter because if there's one thing that I'm sure of it's that the US will take the entire world down with it, but I just... I want to not be here when it happens.
It is so bad.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
Having one of those "I have eleventy things to do and all of them are contingent on someone else" days on top of "I have a firm lock on everything after Friday cos DTO so like, let's move it along folks." Makes it super hard to focus.
Spouse is done with all but one of his courses for this semester. I am so excited for him. This has been a season of changes for us and I'm glad things have gone as well as they have.
For dinner we're having gamjabokkeum for dinner and I'm very excited. Seonkyoung Longest is the best.
Not much else going on. I just wanna play video games all night, but tonight is not the night for that. Gonna help spouse do his final project so we can officially close the door on this semester.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
I feel really good today. It's nice.
Today is the last week I work until January. Spouse is almost done with his courses for the semester. It's just nice.
I think I'm going to rearrange my office during my time off. 1) it's just so cluttered. I have a bunch of stuff I never unpacked that I need to...unpack. 2) It's not conducive to actually doing any projects. I would lik to work on my latchhook rug at some point still. And the sewing machine is in a weird spot. And my crocheting should be in here, not in a shitty pile in our bedroom.
I have these really nice headphones. Like, not hundreds of dollars nice, but NICE, and I just can't wear them for very long. Having pressure on my skull hurts so bad even though they are so soft and padded and wonderful. They even fully go around my ears, so it's not like there's pressure on my lobes. And yet the pain, THE PAIN. I just want to listen to some music and I don't feel like wearing earbuds. ALAS.
Anyway aside from my weeny ears today is really good. 4 more work days until TIME OFF and it's just mostly coasting. A lot to cover, but nothing super major. And I don't have a thousand million meetings, so that's awesome!
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
Ah payday. The day where I get to fuck around on YNAB With Purpose for an hour or two.
I am very type A about some things. I could spend days in YNAB. It is very soothing. Definitely more soothing than doomscrolling.
Coming up on one final week of work before a few weeks off. I am so ready.
Over the break we're gonna be mixing and mastering our newest toadlilies album. It is v good.
I am forever on the fence about getting onto (blech) social media in order to promote our music. On the one hand, more audience is good. On the other hand, people are terrible. And like, I'd love to submit music for pre-review opportunities on like bandcamp and stuff, but they want stuff MONTHS prior to release, and let me just say, when we're done mastering that shit hits the streets IMMMEDIATELY.
I'm bad at capitalism.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
This week has been so weird. Which really just means my brain has been so broken about the passage of time this week. It's Thursday. It doesn't feel like any particular day in any particular way. But it's gonna be 56°F today and then snow tomorrow and that's a fuck. At least the sun is out and that's nice cos I'm half-plant and I need sunshine.
Spouse is like "we should move to Dublin" and then looked up the weather and sunlight and was like "oh, you'll literally die." Did you now sunshine (when it's NOT cloudy which is...never???) is only 5-7 hours IN THE SUMMER? I don't understand how anyone lives so far north. Summer is like 14-15 hours of sunlight and I'm STILL bereft every time it dips below the horizon. Woe betide 2 days in a row with clouds. I need to be in a tropical climate yesterday.
Anyway I started today not crabby but now I am crabby and so I'm gonna go work on that.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
It's supposed to snow Friday. I hate snow. BUT 1) I don't have to leave for any reason, and 2) we actually desperately need precipitation. Our local river is usually VERY DEEP, but right now it's so low there are sandbars. It's wild. And bad. So yay snow I guess.
1.5 weeks to 3 weeks off and I'm already in checked out mode. It's fine. I'm halfway done with my big work project and after today it'll be 2/3 done so that's nice.
I'm not actually doing much of anything aside from [specific work thing at specific times] and honestly it's so nice after 8 fucking weeks of 12-14 hour days and not being able to keep up on everything. I earned this reprieve.
I'm also using this time to continue to look for other employment because I gotta stay nimble and ready to pivot.
In other news the new Destiny 2 content is pretty rad and I'm all about silly and celebratory it is. It is fun. It is good. Also the new Animal Crossing content. I am just awash in fun escapism and it's okay and good.
It's definitely better than lurking and doomscrolling twitter, which I don't even have an account on and haven't since 2017.
I've also been crocheting a blanket. I'll post pics of that when I'm done. I'm using super-chonky yarn and doing a waffle stitch, so it'll be stretchy and cozy and not holey like granny square blankets (which I love, but I wanted something EXTRA WARM).
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
I learned a thing I'm irritated about. Maybe. About work. Because of course. Trying not to be Some Kind of Way about it. Cos maybe I'm wrong. ANYWAY.
This week has been a series of days where the sun is being a tricky siren. It is GORGEOUS looking outside. All sun, zero clouds. It's also like 37°F (4°C). And yesterday the high was below freezing. It's just cruel. I hate cold and I hate seasons. I don't begrudge folks who enjoy seasons, or cold, or whatever. I'm glad that we have a planet (for now) that can accommodate all different climate preferences. I just need to be in a climate that hovers between late spring and summer.
The cat that hates me let me pet her for 20 minutes and then I ruined it by picking her up and putting her on my chest. But hey progress and maybe next time she'll just let me hold her. She's been with us for 10 years and we've made GIANT progress in the 8 months since we moved to our current dwelling.
Now I just need to get hired someplace that'll let me work fully remote from [location I'm pining for]. I don't even think it's a big ask. But apparently at my workplace it is.
Ugh I'm talking about work again. Time to stop that.
My brain thinks it's Friday because it's so nice out. That is so dumb, that is not how time or weather works, but here we are.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
Is it Dec 17th at 5 pm yet? I am ready for time off. So so very ready. I did have a conversation about remote and also potential international moves and I'm still searching for Other Employers. No loyalty in capitalism.
Spouse said a thing to me yesterday that really made me think. He said, correctly, that I'm overqualified for my role. It's very true. It's also a mindfuck to think about how that is 100% true and I also feel imposter syndrom 100000000% of every minunte of every day that I am working. It's fun. Brains are fun.
Anyway, in not-at-all work related news I made borscht yesterday but used the immersion blender cos I didn't feel like eating chunky soup and it was SO GOOD. Think potato leek soup texture but borscht. 13/10 would recommend.
We did our holiday shopping on Saturday and decided to not wait to indulge in gifts cos time is a social construct and who cares. Very excited about my raspberry PS5 remote. It is cute and it feels nice. Got some Jeff VanderMeer books and a couple video games. Snagged an amp and a guitar for spouse. They're very nice.
I'm gonna keep this short because all I want to do is complain about work and that's boring.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.
I'm planning to finally talk to my manager today about being full remote. I've had it with the stress of just NOT actively returning to work. I need to put my needs out there. Plus I spent 8 days in a fevered hellscape because the booster shot kicked my ass. And you might be thinking "but hey you're super vaxed, shouldn't going back be no problem?" To which I say, "that's not the actual problem." I don't want to drive 45 minutes to work every morning and 45 minutes back. My work requires me to be active and available at any time because GLOBAL company and so like, what am I supposed to do, go into work at 10 pm every time someone in [PLACE] needs to chat? Fuck no. I am not productive in a building. I have known this since my previous job allowed me to move to an exterior onsite location. I got SO MUCH done when I was left alone. I have my time wasted by everyone around me. I can't focus. And I don't want to be around anyone who is going to detract from my success.
Anyway I'm expecting to get my request denied because why would anyone ever take my seriously? But I have to try.
I'm also looking feverishly for a new job. Either at [COMPANY] or elsewhere. I don't have loyalties in capitalism.
Speaking of fevers, I got that booster on Nov 24 and had a crazy fever every day until today. But hey, it's over now.
Please:
Be kind to yourself.
Fuck the police.
Keep social distancing.
Wash your hands.
Wear a mask.
GET VACCINATED.
Stay safe.